Human Biohazard

My new leaf fell off the tree about two years ago... but like any good cowboy will tell you, sometimes you've just got to get back on the horse and keep riding. But sometimes you've got to keep beating the horse after it's keeled over and died. I've heard it both ways, and I'm not sure which one is right. But I did another good deed, so I thought I would tell you about it.

I was horribly sick over Thanksgiving. I mean, really, really sick. Puke everywhere. In all of my kindness and concern for people I don't even know, I called the airline I was flying on to try and re-schedule my flight. Unfortunately the airline did not agree with my understanding of kindness, and was going to charge me more than $200 to change my flight! This is unacceptable. I explained how deathly ill I was, and how I could theoretically be considered some sort of biohazard or engineered human terrorist weapon. What do they call those? Smart bombs? I'd be like a walking, breathing smart bomb. The airline did not see my point of view on this, and I think they were upset at the references to anything politically scary. So I had no choice but to fly. I wasn't going to pay more than $200 to change my flight, when the airline obviously didn't care. But here's how this situation becomes a kindness... If an airline cares so little for their passengers, and knowingly allows them to be placed in a situation where they will most likely become violently ill, then it is a service to humanity for all of those passengers to become violently ill, and then for the airline to get the bad publicity. (For fear of a libel suit, I'm not going to name the airline here... but just watch the news. When they trace a massive flu epidemic back to an airline, you'll know where it started.) That airline deserves to lose its customers (but hopefully they lose them because the passengers go elsewhere, not because they died.) Plus, I totally leaned into the aisle whenever I had to breathe, so hopefully I didn't actually breathe on anyone.

I'm going to try and be better about updating this. I'll let you know how it goes.